“you need to give yourself more grace” my counselor once told me as i was heading out his office after a session. “God has given you more grace than you give yourself.”
“damn, that’s huge”, i thought to myself as i exited. ”i am hard on myself.”
i have a wonderful little device that tracks my daily steps called fitbit flex – it’s a small device that you wear on your wrist and go about your day while it tracks your daily activity (the idea is to get in 10,000 steps a day, minimum) – anyway, long story *very* short, my fitbit gave up the ghost the other day. after sending a few emails back and forth with the manufacturer in an attempt to troubleshoot, they apologized for my device no longer working and suggested that i return it to the original point of purchase – only problem being, i no longer had the receipt.
i shot them back another email and apologized that i no longer had the receipt, but that i knew the day i purchased the item and where it was purchased. (i had purchased it at target – on black friday – when that whole mess that you’ve no doubt read about started). i couldn’t even go to target with my debit card to do a receipt look up because i no longer had that debit card thanks to, well, certain circumstances…
i received an email back from fitbit saying that they would make an exception as they could verify when i set up my online account with them and activated my device, so they would send me a replacement free of charge.
& then i was hard on myself.
i began internally berating myself, “why didn’t you keep the receipt? you’re normally so good at that!”
i confessed this negative self talk to my friend right away and she told me in a loving, friend-like way to, “let it go! it’s taken care of!”
i’m still soaking in her reply, still trying to *really* believe that it’s all okay, that this was only a bump in the road and not a major roadblock.
i’m still learning how to give myself grace for not being more put together. i’m still learning to give myself grace and believe that i do not have to be perfect.
i’ll get there (eventually).