one of the blogs i subscribe to had an excellent article about gaining self-confidence. while i wish i had the time and the forethought to touch on everything that was discussed, i couldn’t help but be moved by their final tip on how to embrace a healthy view of self-confidence:
be known and loved: there is no greater key to self-confidence that being intimately known and genuinely loved by another. allowing another human being into the deepest depths of our heart is one of the single most difficult acts in the world today. but doing it (and being loved despite of it) breathes life into our soul and builds confidence in our inner-most being… and this confidence continues to grow as the commitment to each other deepens. (italicized text directly taken from their site)
the art of being known is something that i struggle a great deal with. i find that i am able to surround myself with many surface-level friends: friends who know a part of me, but not the whole me. i can manage allowing people to know bits and pieces of me, while still being able to maintain a sense of control in my life. by allowing someone to know a certain part of me, and another someone a different part, i can compartmentalize myself and keep my sense of security from being fully known. doing this makes me feel safe, but also (if i’m being honest with myself) lonely.
i think that they are on to something that allowing someone in to know me fully will breath life into my being and help in my lack of confidence. i understand it in theory. i’m just not sure if i can take the steps needed to make that happen.